Political depression may be a clinical condition that meets APA criteria for depressive disorders. Symptoms include a depressed or irritable mood most days for most of the day along with thoughts and feelings of sadness, emptiness or hopelessness. Other symptoms may include a constant state of negative self-talk about the past, present and future that may perpetuate or even create the condition. Finally, these symptoms cause significant distress or impairment in social, occupational or other important areas of functioning.
政治性抑郁可能是一种符合 APA 抑郁症标准的临床状况。症状包括在一天中的大部分时间里情绪低落、烦躁,同时伴有悲伤、空虚或无望的想法和感觉。其他症状可能包括不断地就过去、现在和未来与自己进行消极的交谈,这可能会使病情持续下去,甚至造成这种情况。最后,这些症状在社会、职业或其他重要的功能领域造成重大的困扰或损害。
The political part of the diagnosis may be more difficult to define. A politically induced depressive episode may precede, trigger or exacerbate an already active depressive state. However, political depression may bring an added dimension, ==the loss of the thoughts and feelings of control over one’s destiny==. The perception that work, education, imagination and perseverance do not matter and that ==there is a ceiling on one’s possibilities==. This perception may include a particularly powerful American angst owing to centuries old hardwiring of the proposition of unlimited possibility unencumbered by race, gender, religion, ethnicity, or class/wealth.
There may be a melancholy that sets in for older adults who have spent a lifetime building a world on a foundation that appears to have crumbled. Political depression may include a period of bereavement where one mourns the death of the body politic, fondly recalling and reliving experiences of the deceased, a coping mechanism of escape, avoidance and self soothing not far removed from the self-reinforcing quality of drug addiction. Younger adults may experience ==anxiety and even rage, feeling duped or betrayed==, unwilling to begin the daunting task of a re-examination of belief systems. Political depression may, in turn, trigger an even deeper crisis in meaning of life issues as we find ourselves out of step with core beliefs.
Political depression may be partially driven by the fear that one may be materially harmed or socially excluded by conditions beyond one’s control. There may be an element of persecution present: thoughts that one’s government is being driven by a societal paranoia, a fear of the other and that one is the other. There may even be thoughts that one’s society is breeding feelings of inferiority for some of it’s population and that those attempts are so subtle and Machiavellian as to make one question his or her own reality. This may, in turn, create a psychically disturbing gaslight effect, the systematic attempt by a person or institution to erode another’s reality by telling them that what they are experiencing isn’t so.
In short, we may be set adrift in times of political depression, unable to navigate in a murky ocean where nothing is recognizable, there is no land in sight, where the sun, moon and stars all seem out of place and we feel helpless to alter what we perceive as potentially cataclysmic events or limiting situations that go against the very essence of our own belief systems.
The Therapist’s role in Political Depression 心理医生在政治性抑郁中的作用
Dr. Richard Brouillette, author of Why Therapists Should Talk Politics, says that when an economic system or government is responsible for personal harm, ==those affected can feel profoundly helpless and cover that helplessness with anger, guilt and self-criticism==. According to Dr. Brouillette, therapists have typically avoided social and political issues in session, instead re-directing conversation towards symptoms, coping skills, and relevant issues from personal and family life as if to say, the situation exists, deal with it! However, while therapeutic attempts at restricting the circle of meaningful psychological events may work for monkish individuals living on mountaintops, it may only further our sense of isolation from a world changed or operating in a manner we have lost faith or understanding in.
《为什么心理医生应该谈论政治》一文的作者理查德 · 布鲁伊莱特博士 (Dr. Richard Brouillette) 说,当经济体制或政府对个人伤害负有责任时,受影响的人可能会感到深深的无助,并以愤怒、内疚和自我批评来掩盖这种无助。根据他的说法,心理医生通常会在治疗过程中避免社会和政治问题,而是将谈话转向症状、应对技巧以及个人和家庭生活中的相关问题,似乎是在说,情况存在,处理它!这种方式对于住在山顶的苦行僧可能是有效的,但他只会让我们感到距离这个已经发生剧变、而我们又没有信心重新了解的世界越来越远。
Political depression (PD) may be all about our vision in relationship to our environment. Those experiencing PD may normally be active and fervent doers, people of passion with a sense of responsibility for government’s role in working towards those visions and yes, it may include a desire for the power and opportunity to influence and govern others. A price for this great passionate caring and desire may be ==a vulnerability to extreme feelings of loss of control and helplessness==, deep wounds that may very well drive us down the rabbit hole of apathy and isolation where, for a time, it is enough to simply not face the pain of our present perception of that reality.
While a clearer, richer definition of Political Depression may emerge from an ongoing discussion by those affected by it, what seems abundantly clear in the here and now is that Political Depression has knocked on the clinician’s door and that it is a therapeutic responsibility to address what the patient brings through that door. While therapist may debate the how of processing political depression, there may be no more debate on its existence. It is here, it is now, and we as therapists have a responsibility to facilitate healing and growth in the wholeness of our patient’s, not just in the parts we deem important.
Dr. Lusson facilitates a weekly group session on Political Depression in Santa Monica, Ca. For further information contact Dr. Lusson at lusson@gmail.com.
其实在使用 Alist 以前,我就大概摸索出了大概能够满足我需求的方法,就是想办法串流播放网盘资源的原文件。百度网盘的在线播放出了画质和字幕轨音轨都能满足我的需求,于是当时就找了一个叫 Air Explorer 的应用,可以直接调用默认的媒体播放器播放对应百度云资源的原片。我还记得当时第一次用这个应用播放《咱们裸熊》时我内心的想法:「原来我找的资源这么清晰。」
后来阿里云盘流行起来,一段时间阿里云盘的资源到处都是,我因为参与了阿里云盘的内测领了挺多容量,就存了一些想收藏的经典资源。但是试用了一下在线播放就发现,虽然是号称不限速,但是经过转码的资源还是和百度一样,明显码率严重不足。好在后来发现了 阿里云盘小白羊版,同样能提供原文件直接播放,而且体验比 Air Explorer 明显更好,不需要特意将想看的资源移动到一个特定的路径,在线播放也是直接单击即可,而且支持自定义播放器,可以说基本上就是相当于一个更加好用的第三方客户端。
到这里一切看起来都挺美好,直到阿里云盘似乎突然反应过来要审核内容,我花费了一些心思整理的资源开始丢失,很多存的合集少一两部,IMDb Top 250 一路翻下来几乎每一屏都有被标记违规的,而且我似乎永远无法把《色,戒》以一种可以在线播放的形式上传到阿里云盘,洗码几次都不行,改文件名也不行,如果所有资源都要加密上传,那我使用云盘也就失去了意义。
视频质量、使用体验上的落后其实不至于让我完全失去信心,对我影响最深的还是那次 Bilibili 宣布引入《老友记》的事件。《老友记》在上世纪九十年代播出,可以说是无数人回忆中最经典的喜剧类美剧,曾经在搜狐视频上可以观看,然后经过了一些我不知道的事情,国内就几乎一直没有正规的观看渠道了,我自己是在 Netflix 引入老友记后在 Netflix 补完的。后来听说 Bilibili 要引入我一度特别兴奋,我对 B 站的印象比爱优腾好不少(可能主要来源于一些熟悉的 up 主和哈利波特的特效字幕、特制进度条),甚至还记下了播出的日期,打算就在 B 站完成二刷。
也就是说会将 OG image 指向一个域名,这个域名包含了被 UrlEncode 的文章标题和一些其他内容,可以推测应该也和 Gravatar 差不多,是可以通过 URL 直接提供 OG image 的。
于是我在 GitHub 找到了原来的仓库,也是 Vercel 的一个项目:Open Graph Image as a Service。简言之就是可以直接通过 URL 快速生成带有文字的图片,从而实现不用每张 OG image 都手动制作的效果。既可以直接访问网页在网页上制作,也可以直接使用特定的 URL 就会返回特定的图像。可以说和平常转换机场订阅节点的 API 很像了。
但是 craigary 提供的网址没有 nobelium 的 logo,只显示文字。猜测是指定的 logo URL 失效了吧。
我自然是不会这样和他们抢的,之前我每天下午跑步的时候都会看见他在操场散步,于是我就把需要问的题目提前记着,遇到他就追上去边走边问,他听完题目会边走边皱着眉头往上看一会,然后开始给出解法,我再尽可能都记着步骤,回教室再开始算。有时候遇到复杂的题目,他还会晚自习时把我叫到办公室给我补一个更简单的办法,一边给我解释,一边在纸上演算,回头把这张纸也给我一起带走。有时候如果遇到典型的题目,他就会在他一叠叠笔记本中找出翻这个类别的笔记,然后在红红蓝蓝写满了笔记的一页页纸中翻找到归纳了这类题目解法的笔记,然后一把撕下来,叮嘱我给大家传着看看。但更多时候还是他翻着翻着说「坏了,我好像已经撕给 xx 同学了,你去找他抄一下」。虽然后来我写自己的高考目标的时候还是写了中大,但我最后高考的数学成绩还是令我满意。
地理老师是个高个子,比我差不多高了半个头。他永远穿 polo 衫,束在裤子里,显得腿长得夸张。他的脸上常常带着一种苦相,他也是高三才带我们班,第一次见到他不苟言笑的样子,我就怕他不好对付。他说话经常让我感觉到他有一种对自己命运的不甘,手画地图、全球经纬度定位只是基本操作,讲起课来更是常常引经据典,从孔子孟子老子到毛泽东,从柏拉图亚里斯多德到马克思海明威,古今中外无所不包。但更让我佩服的是他的业务能力(也就是找题目印卷子的能力)。我因为经常光顾老师的办公室,经常被各种老师拜托去文印室取卷子。其他科目的老师的卷子一般一次也就薄薄一沓,甚至可以对折起来拿在手里,他的卷子一次能叠十几厘米高,而我们班只有 36 个人。他常说地理卷子看起来多是因为字少图多,实际内容很少,但我每天花在地理卷子上的时间显然不同意这种说法。我每次最怕他上课说某道题大家做得不好,下去他再找几个同类的题,他要是真的随便糊弄只知道布置作业就算了,关键是他每次真的能找到大量的、且同类的题,让我想吐槽都无处下口。他写的一手好字,即使在黑板上也是,他在晚自习偶尔会看一些我连名字都不会读的书,然后向前排同学借现代汉语词典,说是要查一个字。
我真的跑不动了,可能速度没有比走路快多少,我告诉自己,如果我能坚持跑完六圈,我接下来的人生也就没什么困难我不能挺过去了。我咬牙继续。高考前前一个月我的状态不太好,可能是焦虑紧张,也可能就是自然的状态波动,老师们都挺紧张,基本都找我谈话,叮嘱我最后阶段了,不要泄气,坚持下去就是胜利云云,把我听得心烦意乱。一天晚上政治老师也叫我出去,笑着看着我说「怎么样,其他老师都找了你吧?」他一向是个和同学走得比较近的老师「其实我不想找你,但是我怕不找你你觉得我不重视,」他突然露出那种熟悉的狡黠的笑,「我其实很重视,但我相信你自己有数,我多说没什么用。」政治一直是我文综的短板,理论学得滚瓜烂熟,但一到材料还是无处下手,可政治老师又经常莫名其妙地硬捧我,尝尝让我感到无地自容。有次在班上讲课,讲着讲着突然开始在全班面前说起他班上(他带我们下一届的文科重点班)一个学生是我的「粉丝」的事,我本来趴在书上准备闭眼,听到我的名字突然惊醒,但我没有抬头,因为班上已经开始大笑了,他没有要停的意思,继续说着他在他的班上是如何以我们班为榜样,「尤其是 WL 和 X 同学,真的很优秀……」他继续说,「我也经常在我们班同学面前表扬他们两个……」我内心充满着一种说不出来的尴尬羞耻和开心得意的混合情绪,我终于忍不住抬起头但用手捂着脸,还好透过指缝,我只看到了几个和我熟悉的同学在看着我笑。他对我的吹捧和放纵真的到了有点莫名其妙的程度,还好这次他依然选择「信任」我,我反倒觉得释然,起码说明我只是状态有点偏移,肯定没有脱轨。要是他也和我说要重视要调整心态,我可能就会觉得我要完了。
同样的原因,后来英语老师也找我,她也是高三才带的我们,口音来看估计也是学校从湖北挖来的。第一天来班上的时候她穿的上衣没有袖子,当时宿舍一个打篮球的室友坐在我旁边,他看了她的三角肌一眼,张着嘴眨了眨眼睛,扭过头来跟我说他觉得这个老师能做俯卧撑的数量应该比他多。可能因为年轻,她很快就和班上的女生混得很熟,至于我,一向不太和老师对付,尤其是英语是我擅长的学科,基本上也没什么机会和她交流,所以当她也叫我去谈话的时候总觉得有些尴尬。走廊上她抱着手看了我一会,只问最近睡眠怎么样,我说不太好,她说「那不行,要重视睡眠才行,今天回去别熬夜写作业了,好好睡觉。」我有一种说不出的感觉,因为没有老师,甚至我爸妈都很少过问我的睡眠。高考前,她给每个人都准备了透明文件袋用来装文具以及一张鼓励的卡片,我的写的是 Be careful and you will success。高考当天,考场上语文写不完作文的我响铃后还在匆匆写着,监考老师可能看到了我,命令停止答题,我不管仍拼命继续写,我握笔的右手已经颤抖地写不出直线,于是老师要求全体起立才开始收卷。出考场后,我觉得嗓子发酸,一边走一边拼命咽口水。走廊上遇到她,她朝我笑了笑,我忍不住说我没写完作文,说完就径直头也不回地加速往前走。我不知道我为什么要这么做,我只听到她在我背后说「这没什么的!」她说得很大声,我和这层楼的其他同学听得很清楚。我抬起头,但眼泪还是因为我走路的颠簸从我的眼眶里滑落。
前面说过,到了大学,我整个人都是懒散消极的。选课前夕还不知道自己能选课、该选什么课,奖学金申请材料快要截至提交了还不知道自己原来也符合申请条件,怎么计算学分、怎么申请项目、怎么出国交换一概不知,有时候我真的怀疑要是离开了我那两个认真的室友,我的大学生活还能不能好好进行。我印象中我曾经不是这样的人,我也不希望我成为这样的人。我猜想有一部分原因是我对大学阶段巨大的心理落差,但正如前面说的,这怪不了除了自己的任何人,既然已经结出苦果,那就请安静品尝,这不是选择安逸的理由。前些天和我弟一起看哈利波特,里面邓布利多有句台词我特别喜欢:Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light. 更何况我相信自己现在的状况远远还不算 darkest of times,我要做的就是点亮那盏灯,重新找回生活的热情,毕竟对于消极的人,生活每天撞向自己,而对于积极的人,自己每天都拥抱生活。